Monthly Archives: May 2016

Take it off.

I’m going to be a creep and ask you to do somethings, even though you don’t really know me and you have no reason to follow my advice. Let’s play along for now, okay?

When you go home, do the following two things for me. It’s not just for girls. All of us, male, female and everyone in between. We’re doing this together. We’re a team here. (Even though you literally just found this blog)

Okay, so you’re home? (Any other equivalent would do) Good. Now take your makeup off if you’re wearing it. Chill, I’m not against make-up. I love it myself. Just trust me on this one. I’m taking it off with you, too.

Is it done? Cool.

Now take your clothes off. Again, I know I sound like a creep but I’m asking you to play along with me again. Just take it all off. Be sure to close all the doors and windows. Take off any shred of clothing you have on. Go stand in front of your mirror. Take your hair down. If your hairdo took some effort, I respect that yo. But otherwise if you’ve got your hair tied up, let them loose.

Look at yourself. Really, really look at yourself. Turn around, swirl a little, do whatever you want. Just really see yourself. Notice each and every scar, every little freckle, every mole every stretch mark. Don’t let anything go by.  You can pretend you’re at a photo-shoot, if you like. Strike a pose, hold your hair up, do anything you want. Just let yourself loose. Put on a song, dance to it, pretend you’re in a music video. Hell, you can twerk if that’s what you like to do. Just do you.

Now, if you like what you see, you rock! If you don’t like what you see, you rock!

This next step might take a little more effort. I need you to make up a list. Under one head, list all the things you don’t like about yourself which are physical. Under the other head, list all the attributes you like about yourself which are not physical. And don’t be one of those people who’re like I don’t have any good quality. That’s a lie. You know it, I know it, pretty sure everyone else knows it, too.

Which list is longer? The physical one or the other one?

If the list which contains the physical “imperfections” is longer, I’m going to have to ask you to read it again and again. Tell me, something. Are those things  you don’t like about yourself or are they something you’ve been told are wrong with you. This one is going to take a while to realize. You’ll need to think long and hard about it. There are certain things that we think define beauty. That’s the most fuckall concept of them all. I’m more likely to agree with Donald Trump than I am to agree with the fact that beauty can be defined.

The literal definition of beauty is “pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically”. Isn’t that the most flexible and compliant thing you’ve ever read? Some people find the rain beautiful, while some hate it. Some people love Van Gogh while some can’t stand him. We don’t criticize them for it, then why do we do it when it comes to physical appearance of other people? Everything that please YOU is beautiful and everything that doesn’t is not. (Don’t be an asshole and stomp on other people’s opinions. You may like it, you may not like it. Nothing gives you the right to be judgmental towards other people’s opinions) A thigh gap doesn’t define you. Your skin color doesn’t define you. Your weight doesn’t define you. Nothing but your energy defines you. Trust me on this thing. It doesn’t matter what you look like if your energy is positive. I know I sound like a hippie right now talking about Energy and all that crap. But it’s real. The more positive your thoughts are, the more you will accept yourself. The more you accept yourself, the more you are accepting of others. You know, if I think about it now, maybe the only reason I was such a shitty person up until a year ago was because I didn’t accept myself. Although I did all those things without any intention, people did get hurt. I hurt them, because deep down I wanted to hurt myself. I know sorry doesn’t do much, but it’s all I got. You look the way you do because that’s the way it is. If you’re body is healthy, there’s no reason why you should gain or lose weight. Health is everything. It’s all that matters. Instead of trying to fit into the “Ideal” concept of beauty, how about we try to focus on being healthy instead?

Now, if your list of internal qualities was longer than the list of things you don’t like about your physical appearance, I need you to tell me what your thoughts are on what I just said. Am I right or wrong? Please, also tell me if I missed something.

What I was trying to say was that the day you accept yourself, you turn into a newer and better version of yourself. You feel good and you do good. It takes time, I should know. It’s not impossible to love yourself, either. YOU are the person you have to live with for the rest of your life, every waking and sleeping second. The least we can do is love ourselves, right?

With that, we’re done with the weirdest exercise ever.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Explain.

Explain something to me, if you will. I’m a firm believer when it comes to love that you only get one. One, and that’s it. I don’t mean the random dating, or sleeping around or when you just use people. No, I’m talking actual love. If you’ve fallen in love once, you cannot do it again, at least according to me. Yes, it is possible that you’ve failed a few times before you get the right person, but were the past ones actually “Love”? See, I’m the last person to talk about any of this. So bear with me if you want, or correct me if I’m wrong.

How do you fall out of love with someone? How does it happen? You just stop caring about someone who means the world to you? That seems a little impossible to me, if I’m honest. I may not like people in general, but I don’t think I actually hate anyone. I’m a stupidly forgiving person so I might be wrong but is there some internal switch I don’t know about? I was listening to “Love yourself” by Justin Beiber a few days ago and there’s this line which says I fell in love now I feel nothing at all.  Well, maybe you didn’t love her at all, jackass. Because everyone I know who has actually been in love are in two situations. Either they’re still together or they’re still in love with that person. And those who are still hung up, have legit reasons to get over their partners but they can’t because they actually loved them. I think they’re right. Once you love someone you can’t over them because it happens once. Once. That’s it.

I’ve seen my friends dying inside everytime they see a picture of their former partners with someone else. It literally looks like someone has stabbed them in the heart. They go from ear to ear smile to don’t-know-how-to-breathe in one second. I get it, it must be hard to see the person you loved with your life with someone else. Now, to be completely honest my friends are idiots, too. They did some super stupid shit which lead to their break up but tell me something. Couldn’t they be forgiven? Were their mistakes really worth breaking up over? Then again, what do I know? I’d forgive anything if I truly loved someone and believed that they loved me. I mean, of course not literally everything is forgivable but almost everything is.

What I believe is that if you actually love someone it’s magic. Because think about it for a second. You guys aren’t related. You have no obligations or reasons to love them. There’s “blood is thicker than water” kind of bond. You have absolutely no reason to love them but you still do. It’s magic and once the magic takes place I don’t think there exists a spell to undo that kind of magic.

I mean just look at us, man. We whine that we’re alone and when we do find someone we mess things up for no reason. There’s either lack of consideration of lack of forgiveness. One cancels out another, I think. Why do we make things so complicated? Most of the things are forgivable. I understand, once someone messes up they need to learn a lesson. But guess what? People do change. I’m not saying stupid lines like “Love is blind” and all that shit. Love is seeing everything and still accepting them.

No matter what.

But then again, what do I know right?